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" 'Lo!
I tell you a mystery. We shall not all sleep, but we shall all be
changed, in a moment, in the twinkling of an eye, at the last trumpet.
For the trumpet will sound, and the dead will be raised imperishable,
and we shall be changed. For this perishable nature must put on the
imperishable, and this mortal nature must put on immortality. What the Christian disciple is confronted with most is the suffering that accompanies another person as they make the trek from this physical life, giving up their mortal body, and then having their soul reclaimed by God who then makes the decision as to what destiny awaits the newly deceased's soul. I will tell all Christian disciples
that unless they have actually watched a person die, or witnessed a
dying at an accident scene or scene of violence, or been with a person
as they've concluded a long, drawn out period of dying, or been with a
child reaching its end after losing a battle to leukemia, for example... unless the
disciple has been exposed to death on these terms, then my advice for
the disciple is to keep your mouth shut and your opinions to yourself
until you've gained at least some serious bedside experience. If the
disciple already has caregiver experience, and has learned from it, Paul's admonition above means something to the healthy thinking mind; a mind that has time to consider the merit of the words and the thought and purpose behind them. What about the person who is suddenly struck dead by a bullet, or the infant who was not yet of a mature enough mind before its death, or the old person who due to dementia or Alzheimer's is no longer able to process the meaning of Paul's words? What about these people? Do Paul's words have any relevance to the reality of the non-cogent dying situation? The truth of the matter is that the Christian
disciple unused to being around sick and dying people very often feels
woefully inadequate when trying to render comfort and aid. Sometimes,
the disciple will feel hurt when the dying person wants no longer to
hear their words and, what seems to them in their hour of apprehension and
fear, are vague and There are special missions the disciple can participate in dealing with death. Ofttimes, the message delivered by the disciple to the dying person is welcomed; it brings comfort, comfort in not only the meaning behind the message, but comfort also where the suffering soul feels that someone actually cares about them in their hour of travail. I have not personally witnessed the death of a child. I hope never to. When I was 11 years old, I held the head of a man who collapsed and died violently of a massive heart attack. When I was 61 years old, I cared for and watched my wife die after six years of heart disease and end-stage renal disease. When I was 68, I cared for and watched my mother die. The man who had the heart attack... I had no idea whether he was a Christian, or whether Christ entered his mind during his last moments of life. On the other hand, my wife was content with God, not afraid of dying and - I know what I saw at that moment - He sent a spiritual emissary to guide her soul back to Him. My mother, was afraid of dying one moment, then another moment, it didn't seem like such a bad idea to a 92-year-old who had clearly outlived her body and her mind. It's people, give or take 10 years, like my mother who the Christian disciple is likely to meet when they make Hospice, hospital and long-term, extended-care visits. They will meet oldsters who are in their right minds, and very likely more who are out of their minds. So, what's the disciple to do in these situations? How does the disciple meaningfully communicate with the non-cognizant person? Chances are, they don't. When in the company of an older person - cognizant or incoherent - who is drawing near death, the Christian disciple must carefully choose their words. Yes, you are encouraged to read aloud the Psalms, but watch what you pray for in the person's presence. One misplaced word can instantly trigger an irrational outburst of concern or even fear. The disciple says and means one thing - the old person misconstrues it and comes to a frightening conclusion. Pick comforting Psalms and other New Testament verses that clearly are meant to comfort the soul. Evangelist Billy Graham, I believe, has said it best - and often - to family and friends concerning the fear, depression, and physical pain of advanced age, "As a Christian, I know how to die. But nobody ever taught me how to grow old." Many times the Christian disciple visiting the sick and dying will be alone with the person. This may be the one and only time when the person may want to make a confession of a wrongdoing or sin. The disciple should be sensitive to the fact that the Roman Catholic Church holds Confession to be one of seven holy sacraments that is to be communicated between the confessor and his or her priest. Whereas Lutherans and Presbyterians hold confession to be a part of liturgical services, but not a holy sacrament. With that said, there will come those times when the dying person may want to get something off their chest, and will ask the visiting disciple to 'hear their confession'. My advice: do it. In the majority of cases, the Christian disciple will not be called upon to bring the Gospel of Christ to the dying person; there's a good chance it's a Christian who is dying. What the ministering disciple must bring to the dying person is emotional comfort, as best as possible; not to bring up fearful topics; not to worry the suffering soul, and to be at the ready to administer comforting aid. If a dying person will be made to feel better by telling a disciple their 'sins', then it is mandatory the disciple lend a confidential, discrete ear, make no judgments about what's heard, and always press home the point that God forgives all sins... ALL SINS... confessed by those who believe in His Son, Jesus Christ. Be forewarned, though, what the disciple has to say to the elderly dying person has to be said concisely and precisely, in very simple terms, and usually, due to diminished hearing, in a louder voice than normal. The attention span of this aged person is nearly nil, and while the disciple thinks the person is listening to and comprehending what's being said, chances are the old-aged mind has quickly drifted elsewhere. In a near-death situation with the older person, they often will say things that may be nonsensical, argumentative, or even hurtful to the listener. Don't take it personally, and just get on with the task of giving comfort as best you can. When an old person near death asks you directly, "Am I going to die?" don't try to dress up your response with anything other than the truth. I've found that the dying elderly do not like to be lied to. Instead, in all reverence and sincerity, answer their question with a "Yes." Once the disciple has confirmed the dying person's suspicion, then the disciple will often witness a person grasping hold of the time and place to come to amends with their Creator, God, and by verbal admissions washing clean their soul. In peace he or she goes to God. Just think of the poor soul who does not have the crucial element of time in which to cleanse their soul with a confession meant exclusively for God's ears. We lament those people who were denied such an opportunity because their death was so sudden and unexpected. They had no time to lighten their souls with their confession. For them we weep. It must be kept in mind by the Christian disciple that physical death is not something to be feared, and is considered by many who suffer to be a friend. For those of us who endure a degenerative disease over years of torment, frankly, we want a release from the pain. If disease-related medication and therapy are no longer effective and pain management loses efficacy, to the person who has endured a long-term disease, death is his or her only natural ally, an ally not to be feared but welcomed. For on the other side of death awaits God in a world that no longer has pain and sorrow. To obtain an excellent view of the afterlife, from the Hindu viewpoint, you are encouraged to read the small work, the Katha Upanishad, where you will meet Lord Yama, custodian of the afterlife. It comes as a pleasant surprise to Western readers to learn that death and afterlife in the Hindu belief system is not a place to be feared, but in many ways, enjoyed. Christians will also see a similarity between the Book of Job and the Katha Upanishad - especially in the back half. The Judeo-Christian belief system does not dwell heavily on the afterlife once death has occurred. Our God is a god of life, a god of the moment, where He is always presenting himself empirically, spiritually and intellectually to mankind. The God of the Hebrews is the cutting edge of physical and spiritual realization, and is so with or without the presence of mankind. One need only to observe the universe to realize this. Looking at God thus so, for some, brings forth a new, expanded meaning behind God's words to Moses when He declares His own name: "I AM." Jesus further tells us this in Matthew 22: 24 - 32 - " 'Teacher', they said, 'Moses told us that if a man dies without having children, his brother must marry the widow and have children for him. Now there were seven brothers among us. The first one married and died, and since he had no children, he left his wife to his brother. The same thing happened to the second and third brother, right on down to the seventh. Finally, the woman died. Now then, at the resurrection, whose wife will she be of the seven, since all of them were married to her?' "Jesus replied, 'You are in error because you do not know the Scriptures or the power of God. At the resurrection people will neither marry nor be given in marriage; they will be like the angels in heaven. But about the resurrection of the dead - have you not read what God said to you, 'I am the God of Abraham, the God of Isaac, and the God of Jacob? He is not the God of the dead but of the living.' " The 'angels in heaven' are of the substance of God; our soul is of the same substance, and when we die, God our Father reclaims what is rightfully His. Notice, if you will, how Jesus in replying to the question does not get bogged down in Jewish protocol with his answer, but instead cuts the 'Gordian knot' by giving us another glimpse of what heaven is like. But, like Moses, the Psalms, the Prophets, John the Baptist and himself, Jesus makes two revolutionary, major points at the end of his answer: God, our Father, is our own personal, individual God, as he was to Abraham, Isaac and Jacob. Even more important, our God is the god of the living, not the dead. This is important when comparing the Hebrew God to the gods of the ancient Egyptians, Hindus, Persians and Babylonians. The Egyptians, especially, placed extraordinary emphasis on dying and the voyage to the afterlife. Reference the tomb of Tutankhamen for excellent illustrations of this. "When he arrived at the house of Jairus, he did not let anyone go in with him except Peter, John and James, and the child's father and mother. Meanwhile all the people were wailing and mourning for her. 'Stop wailing,' Jesus said. 'She is not dead but asleep.' They laughed at him, knowing that she was dead. But he took her by the hand and said, 'My child, get up!' "Her spirit returned, and at once she stood up. Then Jesus told them to give her something to eat. Her parents were astonished, but he ordered them not to tell anyone what had happened." - Luke 8: 51 - 56 Thanks to the intervention of Jesus, Jairus' daughter was brought back to life and permitted to live. What today's Christian disciple may well be confronted with are those instances where, despite the pleading and prayers of the parents, their child dies... and there is no resurrection. The one thing the disciple does not want to say is, 'That it was God's will your son, or your daughter, died.' To do so is to invite being handed your head - severed by the sharp rebuke of the wounded and hurting child's parents, relatives or concerned others within earshot. Stop and think about this for a moment: God does not create children for the singular purpose of having them killed either at birth or within a few weeks, months, or years. There are other things at work here, and the Christian disciple needs to be aware of them before he or she opens their mouth and proceeds to make a fool of themself, in addition to doing real damage to the message of God through Jesus. Premature babies died 100 years ago. Thanks to medical science, most premature neonates now have a good chance of survival. Older children developing leukemia 50 years ago had slim chances of survival. Today, the odds of these children surviving are growing much better; again thanks to medical science, research and pharmacology. A teenager is killed in a car crash, and ofttimes the cry is heard: "Why did God let this happen?" Despite the best medicine, despite the best safety rules and innovations built into automobiles, babies die, older children die, and teenagers die. Recall, if you will, in the chapter, 'Prayers, miracles... what's going on here?' I mentioned The Government of God. This 'government' is essentially the real world of physics, chemistry, energy and matter as applied throughout The Creation. Though not all that original, I've often been caught saying that there isn't a human being so strong that they cannot be conquered by a bacterial or viral microbe. Under the right circumstances, any advanced living organism can be overcome by infection or disease. And thanks to the intellectual and inspirational gifts of God being granted to those who practice the healing arts, many of the microscopic death dealers are, themselves, being done away with. Always remember that the Government of God accommodates action and reaction - especially in the field of medicine. But the Government of God does not cheerfully accommodate stupidity. In my neighborhood, there has been an outbreak of high school-aged children dying in car accidents. The causes of the accidents are the usual elements: speed, lack of driving experience, and one recently new factor - cell phone usage, especially text messaging while driving. A crash occurs and the car passengers are usually severely injured or killed. Now, who wants to be the first to stand and wail, "Why did God let this happen?" When the police report comes in, and the forensic facts are presented, who is going to blame God? And if they do, what's their justification? Yet, after the child's death, the Christian disciple will have to say something. If the disciple is put on the spot by hurt, irate and angered parents pressing their questions, the answer from the disciple, "I don't know." just isn't going to suffice. My advice: rehearse your answer, or answers. Be prepared to be assaulted by angry and hurt parents, and be just as prepared to come back with an answer that is delivered in a calm, and reassuring voice, and without hesitation. Something like this: "I realize that you are hurting and angry over what happened to your child. I pray that God will place His hand on your heart and make the anguish go away. We cannot know the infinite wisdom of God, nor can we fully understand why bad things happen to good people; but they do, and what we must do - and it is our duty to do - is to take from this painful experience and learn from it, growing in our own wisdom and understanding. You, dear heart, must not let the events and outcome of this terrible experience beat you down and defeat you. Instead, you must summon your courage and strength, and turn to God for solace and healing. Yes, mourn your loss, but take from it the wisdom you will gain and, in turn, when another parent experiences what you have experienced here, show your compassion and let others draw comfort from your glowing spirit of faith in God the Father and His Son, Jesus Christ the healer of wounded hearts. Throw your burden onto the shoulders of Christ and he will not only carry it for you, but in your weakest moment of spiritual exhaustion and pain, he will carry you. Find joy in knowing that your child is now in God's presence." Christian discipleship dealing with death requires special training and 'on the job experience', so to speak. Most churches have distinct ministries that educate disciple members on being useful to a person that may be desperately in need of spiritual handholding, training on what to say and do, and the opportunity to make Hospice, home or hospital visits accompanying the church pastor. Observe and learn from the pastor, and, or the experienced church elders, who administer these ministries. The Christian disciple is encouraged to learn this special ministry well, and in so doing, will bring untold comfort to grieving parents, a new widow or widower, or to a dying human being. |